Are you willing to admit your weaknesses publicly? During my executive coaching sessions I come across such issues fairly frequently and I see a certain pattern evolving.
People do know their weaknesses, but, they feel very uncomfortably, or often insecure, about it. Then they develop a defence mechanism. When they roll out their defensive action, they actually appear ‘funny’ (or aggressive, evasive) and fall in discredit with others.
Example: (For the negative stuff i always quote myself) As a young executive I felt very unsure about myself as I did not have a university degree; even more, when I was a manager and many of my staff did have a better education than me. So, whenever the subject of education came up, I was very evasive and often down talked the value of ‘just theoretical knowledge’ that you get from a university education. No doubt, people listening to me would have frowned a bit, and certainly my comments were not to my credit. Let’s always keep in mind that people make general judgements about others based on little events, like a small conversation. So, I have to assume that people thought less of me after hearing such comments from me.
As I matured, I learned to speak more openly about this. I know I have competence, integrity, and the right attitude to do a good job. In my mind, that is pretty good already, enough to give me self-assurance. Whenever we talked about degrees I could confidently say: ‘Don’t have! I know, it could have been helpful in the early part of my career. But, it didn’t happen.’ At the same time I could also discuss the value of higher education without making any depreciating comments. As a result I came across more authentic.
Authenticity, that is my point.
- Be aware of your strong points. No harm ‘advertising’ these as well. That nourishes your self-confidence.
- Be aware of your weaknesses and be able to deal with them by having a plan to improve it, or, sometimes, the weakness is just there and you have to live with it. If your weakness comes up in a discussion, comment truthfully as things are. My bet is that many people will judge like me. People being able to talk about their weaknesses appear honest and full of confidence. No, not appear, they are!
For comfort (and model answer) we all have weaknesses, so have you. If somebody appears like not having a weakness, it only means that we don’t know this person well enough yet.
People do know their weaknesses, but, they feel very uncomfortably, or often insecure, about it. Then they develop a defence mechanism. When they roll out their defensive action, they actually appear ‘funny’ (or aggressive, evasive) and fall in discredit with others.
Example: (For the negative stuff i always quote myself) As a young executive I felt very unsure about myself as I did not have a university degree; even more, when I was a manager and many of my staff did have a better education than me. So, whenever the subject of education came up, I was very evasive and often down talked the value of ‘just theoretical knowledge’ that you get from a university education. No doubt, people listening to me would have frowned a bit, and certainly my comments were not to my credit. Let’s always keep in mind that people make general judgements about others based on little events, like a small conversation. So, I have to assume that people thought less of me after hearing such comments from me.
As I matured, I learned to speak more openly about this. I know I have competence, integrity, and the right attitude to do a good job. In my mind, that is pretty good already, enough to give me self-assurance. Whenever we talked about degrees I could confidently say: ‘Don’t have! I know, it could have been helpful in the early part of my career. But, it didn’t happen.’ At the same time I could also discuss the value of higher education without making any depreciating comments. As a result I came across more authentic.
Authenticity, that is my point.
- Be aware of your strong points. No harm ‘advertising’ these as well. That nourishes your self-confidence.
- Be aware of your weaknesses and be able to deal with them by having a plan to improve it, or, sometimes, the weakness is just there and you have to live with it. If your weakness comes up in a discussion, comment truthfully as things are. My bet is that many people will judge like me. People being able to talk about their weaknesses appear honest and full of confidence. No, not appear, they are!
For comfort (and model answer) we all have weaknesses, so have you. If somebody appears like not having a weakness, it only means that we don’t know this person well enough yet.
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